Джордж Карлин: Актуальные цитаты (страница 6)
Актуальные цитаты Джордж Карлин · Прочитать последние цитаты
We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often. We’ve learned how to make a living, but not a life. We’ve added years to life not life to years. We’ve been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor. We conquered outer space but not inner space.
Разное
Ни тебе послеродового ухода, ни детского сада, ни дошкольного образования, ни школьных завтраков, ни продовольственной помощи, ни социальных пособий — ничего. Если ты нерождённый — ты в шоколаде; если ты дошкольник — ты попал.
They will do anything for the unborn. But once you’re born, you’re on your own. Pro-life conservatives are obsessed with the fetus from conception to nine months. After that, they don’t want to know about you. They don’t want to hear from you. No nothing. No neonatal care, no day care, no head start, no school lunch, no food stamps, no welfare, no nothing. If you’re preborn, you’re fine; if you’re preschool, you’re fucked.
О священности жизни
Нет.» Бах! Готов. «У моего Бога член длиннее, чем у твоего!». Тысячи лет — кровавейшие, жесточайшие войны, и всё из-за религиозной ненависти. По мне, так всё нормально: когда толпа святош хочет поубивать друг друга — я просто счастлив.
Sanctity of life. You believe in it? Personally, I think it’s a bunch of shit. Well, I mean, life is sacred? Who said so? God? Hey, if you read history, you realise that God is one of the leading causes of death. Has been for thousands of years. Hindus, Muslims, Jews, Christians all taking turns killing each other 'cuz God told them it was a good idea. Millions of dead motherfuckers all because they gave the wrong answer to the God question. «You believe in God?» «No.» *Pdoom*. Dead. «You believe in God?» «Yes.» «You believe in my God?» «No.» *Poom*. Dead. «My God has a bigger dick than your God!» Thousands of years. Thousands of years, and all the best wars, too. The bloodiest, most brutal wars fought, all based on religious hatred. Which is fine with me. Hey, any time a bunch of holy people want to kill each other I’m a happy guy.
О священности жизни
„Мой дедушка частенько мне говорил: «Сейчас я пойду наверх и выебу твою бабушку.»“
Видите ли, он просто был кристально честным человеком. Он не собирался пудрить мозги даже четырёхлетнему карапузу.
Reminds me of something my grandfather used to say. He used to say "I'm going upstairs and fuck your grandma." Well, he was just a really honest man, you know? He wasn't going to bullshit a four year old.
That's what your house is, a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get... more stuff!
Разное
So having ten commandments was really a marketing decision! It is clearly a bullshit list. It's a political document artificially inflated to sell better.
О религии