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“Why do all your brilliant ideas involve felonies?”

“An elite confederacy of nerds. My peeps”

“Who's going to rob us? A crackhead crab? A jellyfish junkie?”

“Parallel tough-guy nods."What now?" I asked, hoping to divert the two from actually beating their chests.”

“Let's do it. Monkeys are always funny. You pretty much can't go wrong with a monkey, right? Hi paused. Well unless that monkey wants you dead, or does needle drugs or something. Then it's wrong, and a bad monkey.”

“Death in anonymity is the ultimate insult to human dignity.”

“Baravetto was unconscious when we found him," Hi said. "What'd you do to the guy?"

"Kicked him in the balls, then brained him with a rolling pin. Twice.”

“You all right now?"
"I'm exceptional. Wonderful. Thanks for the concern. You complete me.”

“We did just leave an insane asylum,” Hi agreed. “For all we know, Chance spend his nights dancing naked with sock puppets, plotting to invade Canada.”

“I see you, Ben. I always have. You're in my pack."
He pulled away.
"What if being packmates isn't enough for me?”

“God help anyone who messes with the Virals!”

“Tory a father isn’t supposed to fear his fourteen-year-old daughter. That being sad, you terrify me.”

“She wanted to feel safe. Untouchable in her home. The ultimate female fantasy.”

“Ben locked his eyes on mine for a long moment. Then, “How?” “How do you think?” I smiled, then slapped him full across the face”

“I’m adding ‘canine’ to my searches,” I said. “And ‘instinct.’” “Whatever. I’m adding ‘lunatic.”

“Hey, check this weirdo out." Hi was inspecting a bust on the mantel. "This face is ninety percent eyebrow. What do you want to bet he owned slaves?"

Scowling to match the carving's expression, Hi spoke in a gravelly voice.”

“Im studying jerkoffs in the wild," Ben answered dryly. "This seemed like a good chance to view one up close.”

“Ben yanked Hi sideways as spikes snapped from the wall…Once again, only Ben’s reflexes had saved him. “Please stop doing that!” Ben barked. “Please keep doing that!” Hi warbled.”

“Chance wore a white tuxedo with tails. On anyone else? Doopy. On him? Yes, please.”

“Fine. Everybody wears seatbelts. No radio. No distractions.” Ben shot Hi a stern look. “No running commentary.” “Your loss,” Hi said. “To the pimp ride!”

“Hiram!' Shelton ran to Hi's side. 'Aren't you you bleeding? I thought she shot you!'
'Red wine. When I saw it running everywhere, I played dead.' He winced as Shelton poked his belly. 'But I'm not leaping off any more shelves. That was pretty stupid.”

“I have a cotillion event. Some yacht-club charity fundraiser thingy. Whitney is insisting, and Kit took her side.” Three wide smiles. “Oh shut up.”

“So what's the plan?” Ben asked.

“Go inside. Look around. Improvise.”

“Brilliant." Hi stroked his chin. “Quick question: Is having no plan the same as having a terrible plan, or are those different categories?”

“I hated myself for needing him at such times, for craving his strength whenever I felt upset.”

“Today he wore a burnt-orange shirt, black pants, and a tie that looked like a street fight at the south end of the color wheel.”

“As a pirate, she once undressed a fencing instructor using only her sword!”