Джордж Карлин: Актуальные цитаты
Актуальные цитаты Джордж Карлин · Прочитать последние цитатыYou know how I describe the economic and social classes in this country? The upper class keeps all of the money, pay none of the taxes. The middle class pays all of the taxes, does all of the work. The poor are there… just to scare the shit out of the middle class. Keep 'em showing up at those jobs.
„Мой дедушка частенько мне говорил: «Сейчас я пойду наверх и выебу твою бабушку.»“
Видите ли, он просто был кристально честным человеком. Он не собирался пудрить мозги даже четырёхлетнему карапузу.
Reminds me of something my grandfather used to say. He used to say "I'm going upstairs and fuck your grandma." Well, he was just a really honest man, you know? He wasn't going to bullshit a four year old.
I’ve got this real moron thing I do, it’s called thinking. And I’m not a very good Amercian because I like to form my own opionions. I don't roll over when I'm told to.
„Хотите избавиться от фальшивых денег — положите их в миску для пожертвований в церкви!“
If you want to get rid of counterfeit money, put it in the collection plate at church.
О религии
That's what your house is, a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get... more stuff!
Разное
We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often. We’ve learned how to make a living, but not a life. We’ve added years to life not life to years. We’ve been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor. We conquered outer space but not inner space.
Разное
Пластик, говнюк!
The planet will be here for a long, long, LONG time after we’re gone, and it will heal itself, it will cleanse itself, ’cause that’s what it does. It’s a self-correcting system. The air and the water will recover, the earth will be renewed. And if it’s true that plastic is not degradable, well, the planet will simply incorporate plastic into a new paradigm: the earth plus plastic. The earth doesn’t share our prejudice toward plastic. Plastic came out of the earth. The earth probably sees plastic as just another one of its children. Could be the only reason the earth allowed us to be spawned from it in the first place. It wanted plastic for itself. Didn’t know how to make it. Needed us. Could be the answer to our age-old egocentric philosophical question, “Why are we here?”. Plastic, asshole!
О человечестве
I gave up on this stuff. I gave up on my species and … I gave up on my countrymen. Because I think we squandered great gifts. I think humans were given great great gifts: walking upright, binocular vision, opposable thumb, large brain … We grew. We had great gifts, and we gave it all up for both money and God … We gave it all up to superstition, primitive superstition, primitive shit … Invisible man in the sky, looking down, keeping track of what we do, make sure we don’t do the wrong thing, if we do, he puts us in hell, where we burn forever. That kind of shit is very limiting for this brain we have. So we keep ourselves limited. And then we want a toy and a gizmo and gold and we want shiny things, and we want something to plug in that will make big big big things for us… And all that shit is nothing! It's nothing.
Телевизионное интервью Джорджа Карлина (2008)
О человечестве