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Крошоу, Бенджамин цитаты
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Бенджамин Ричард «Yahtzee» Крошоу — английский комедийный писатель, игровой журналист и разработчик квестов на движке Adventure Game Studio. Он писал статьи для журнала Hyper, главного обозревателя игр в Австралии. На своём сайте «Fully Ramblomatic» он каждую неделю публикует мрачные юмористические статьи, эссе, рассказы и вебкомиксы. Также делает видеообзоры Zero Punctuation для журнала The Escapist, а также ведёт еженедельную колонку Extra Punctuation. В феврале 2008 года в выпуске PC Gamer , Крошоу в качестве редактора сделал обзор на «Backspace» Gary Whitta. В августе 2010 года была опубликована его новелла Mogworld. Он один из четырёх основателей The Mana Bar, австралийского коктейл-бара и зала видеоигр. Wikipedia  

✵ 24. Май 1983
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Крошоу, Бенджамин: Цитаты на английском языке

“My secret? Hm. Well, I think the secret is this. Don't come up with a really ambitious twelve-CD monster for your first project, because it'll be doomed very quickly. For your very first release, make something small. Put as much effort into it as you can muster, but don't feel pressured. Then, for every subsequent release, push yourself just a little bit harder to make a better product. By the time you've churned out your sixth or seventh, you'll have a pretty solid reputation.”

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Ben Croshaw

http://www.adventure-treff.de/artikel/interviews.php?id=30&lang=eng
Other Articles

“The zip on my wallet broke, sealing the money inside. How am I supposed to buy a new wallet?”

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Ben Croshaw

29 January 2010
Twitter

“At this time I was hesitant to venture into the greenery, because I wasn't keen on the possibility of having spiders the size of basketballs drop onto my face from overhead branches and refuse to let go. (…) Hunger pains were moving to the 'excruciating' stage by mid-morning. After a last-ditch attempt to extract nutrients from filling my mouth with sand, I decided that, if a big spider the size of a basketball dropped onto my face and tried to eat it, I would eat it back and we could turn the whole thing into an exciting competition.”

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Ben Croshaw

Источник: Fullyramblomatic Novels, Fog Juice, Chapter Two

“The thing is, if you complain to me about it, you are basically complaining to the pig because your sausages were undercooked. I know my name is on the front of the cover in big fat serifed letters, but I've got nothing to do with distribution and sales or anything to do with Amazon. If you are dissatisfied with their service, then complain to them. Repeatedly. With sticks.”

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Ben Croshaw

16 September 2010 in regards to Mogworld issues on Amazon.com
Fully Ramblomatic

“I believe in being cruel to be kind. I love gaming, I have done all my life. I want to see it lifted in the eyes of the general public above how they view it now. Pottering endlessly about with the same dreary plots and game mechanics isn't helping any of us evolve.”

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Ben Croshaw

http://www.destructoid.com/destructoid-interview-ben-yahtzee-croshaw-69631.phtml
Other Articles

“But the cruellest thing you can do to an artist is tell them their work is flawless when it isn't.”

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Ben Croshaw

23 March 2008
Fully Ramblomatic

“Also, you can't prove that there isn't a ghost of Bagpuss hovering right behind your head as you read this. He's right there, man! No, he disappeared right after you turned your head. I swear he's there. Look, he's back again now!”

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Ben Croshaw

Meet the Crazy Moon Man
Fully Ramblomatic, Essays

“I used to be one of the guys, you know. I used to be another faceless contributor in a wall of opinion. I miss those days.”

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Ben Croshaw

1 August 2008
Fully Ramblomatic

“The curtains were drawn, and the only source of light - indeed, the object to which my attention was suddenly exclusively drawn - was a lit candle on the kitchen table, that had probably originally been shaped like Snoopy but was now a mass of melted rivulets, as if Snoopy had fallen victim to some kind of flesh-eating virus.”

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Ben Croshaw

Источник: Fullyramblomatic Novels, Fog Juice, Chapter One

“Yes, I have been harvested by mainstream media for whatever time remains for television to still be called 'mainstream' before the internet destroys it once and for all.”

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Ben Croshaw

14 February 2008
Fully Ramblomatic

“Ctrl+Alt+Del is the Rubbish King, sitting proudly on a throne of rotting meat.”

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Ben Croshaw

http://au.gamespot.com/pages/news/show_blog_entry.php?topic_id=26300119
Other Articles

“I seem to have gathered a reputation for being a jerk in real life, because frankly fans make me uncomfortable. Complete strangers come up and talk to me like they've known me their whole lives, and for that reason I can seem a bit stand-offish… No, the whole "fan" thing confuses me.”

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Ben Croshaw

http://www.escapistmagazine.com/articles/view/editorials/interviews/6457-An-Exclusive-Interview-With-Yahtzee.3
Other Articles

“There's nothing I enjoy more than sitting down with a big piece of marmite on toast and reading through the archives of a good webcomic. The only problem is that the good webcomics are all hidden behind pile upon pile of testicle sweat masquerading as entertainment.”

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Ben Croshaw

The Only Good Comics on the Internet
Fully Ramblomatic, Features

“We've learned that you should never trust English professors who stick computer chips in their arms, breakfast cereal mascots, Stephen King, the Borg collective, vegetarians, Christians, Microsoft Word helpers and people who put five exclamation marks on the ends of their statements.”

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Ben Croshaw

I'm Off
Fully Ramblomatic, Essays

“People followed Jesus, I think because they wanted to have sex with him. Ho yes, they so wanted some of that holy jiggy-jiggy! (cough) sorry. (Why it Would Kick Arse to be Jesus)”

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Ben Croshaw

Источник: Fully Ramblomatic, Essays

“What was your favourite single player Quake level? One of the forty identical greenish-brown castles or one of the forty identical brownish-green castles?”

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Ben Croshaw

2 December 2004
Fully Ramblomatic

“Valentines card idea: "You are my iron lung. Let me come inside you and breathe heavily."”

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Ben Croshaw

10 October 2010
Twitter

“Winning the lottery is like slipping your hand into the bra of the most beautiful woman in the world, then getting it stuck and having to saw it off at the wrist.”

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Ben Croshaw

Источник: Fullyramblomatic Novels, Articulate Jim: A Search For Something, Chapter Eight

“Christians are a funny lot, aren't they? It doesn't seem to matter what their God does, they'll just keep on loving him regardless.”

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Ben Croshaw

8 November 2003
Fully Ramblomatic

“[begin list of sophomoric puns] I bet he'd find a place up the chimney of any woman. He's certainly good at filling their stockings. Trouble is, he wouldn't be much good as a lover as he can only come once a year. [end list of sophomoric puns] (Why Chicks Dig Father Christmas)”

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Ben Croshaw

Fully Ramblomatic, Essays

“Girls: Please do not offer yourself to Yahtzee. He found that this got old very fast.”

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Ben Croshaw

Contact page http://www.fullyramblomatic.com/contact.htm
Fully Ramblomatic

“No book critic has ever tried to assess the Old Testament. Maybe they should. I did once. It's a crap story and it's very badly written.”

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Ben Croshaw

Where God Went Wrong
Fully Ramblomatic, Essays

“I’d like the power to make things die with the power of my mind. Not because I have any specific use in mind for it; I just think it’d be useful to have for difficult social situations. Like, if you’re trying to sleep on a plane and a bloke three seats down is laughing really loudly at a film. Or if someone’s trying to make me say something nice about their hideous baby, it would be a good way to change the subject. But then again, that’s really just replacing one awkward social situation with another.”

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Ben Croshaw

http://www.darkhorse.com/Blog/1125/interview-yahtzee-croshaw-about-jam
Other Articles

“If you honestly need the calendar to instruct you to show affection to your partner then what kind of loveless nightmare are you trapped in”

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Ben Croshaw

14 February 2011
Twitter

“The presence of The Sean has a tendency to taint a film, I find, because he is never his character; he's always just The Sean.”

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Ben Croshaw

The Leauge of Extraordinary Gentlemen
Fully Ramblomatic, Reviews

“The question that no-one ever asks in the Pokemon world is why that long-dead illustrious and ethical human being, having created the technology to store big things in very small things, decided to use this gimmick the way he did - storing potentially deadly ferocious animals with magic powers in a little thingy that you can hang off your belt. Because he wanted the power, that's why. He wanted to know the ecstasy of holding five deadly creatures round his waist. He probably got off on that sort of thing, the sick weirdo.”

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Ben Croshaw

Why it would kick arse to be a Pokemon trainer http://www.fullyramblomatic.com/essays/pokemon.htm
Fully Ramblomatic, Essays

“You couldn't make this any smaller without needing a sewing needle and magnifying glass to work it. I'm tempted to see if I can swallow it, and belch the White Album all the way home.”

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Ben Croshaw

On his iPod Shuffle, 5 June 2007
Fully Ramblomatic

“Consider how The Dark Knight got away with a rating of PG-13 in the US by skilfully not showing any blood. Does that make it any more suitable for children? Or will there be a generation of youngsters haunted by visions of white-faced sadists brandishing pencils?”

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Ben Croshaw

http://web.archive.org/web/20081015182445/http://www.news.com.au/technology/story/0,25642,24493980-5014239,00.html
Other Articles

“You're never alone when you're totally self-absorbed.”

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Ben Croshaw

http://www.escapistmagazine.com/articles/view/editorials/interviews/6457-An-Exclusive-Interview-With-Yahtzee
Other Articles

“"Hey, mister professional game critic, have you ever heard of this obscure game called 'Deus Ex'?" This is why I hate reading my email.”

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Ben Croshaw

12 September 2010
Twitter