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Джей Лено

Дата рождения: 28. Апрель 1950

Джей Лено — лауреат «Эмми», американский актёр, стэнд-ап комик, телеведущий и писатель, наиболее известный как ведущий телепередачи «The Tonight Show» на канале NBC.


„Невозможно злиться на того, кто заставляет вас смеяться.“

„Вышла книга с полным перечнем стран, которые ненавидят Америку. Она называется «Большой атлас мира».“


„Today is Valentine's Day. Or, as men like to call it, extortion day. Сегодня День святого Валентина — или, как мужчины любят это называть, Всемирный день вымогательства!“

„The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D. C. This wasn't for any religious reasons. They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin.“

„With hurricanes, tornados, fires out of control, mud slides,
flooding, severe thunderstorms tearing up the country from one
end to another, and with the threat of bird flu and terrorist
attacks, "Are we sure this is a good time to take God out of
the Pledge of Allegiance?“

„CNN found that Hillary Clinton is the most admired woman in America. Women admire her because she's strong and successful. Men admire her because she allows her husband to cheat and get away with it.“

„You can't stay mad at someone who makes you laugh.“

„Go through your phone book, call people and ask them to drive you to the airport. The ones who will drive you are your true friends. The rest aren't bad people; they're just acquaintances.“


„Politics is just show business for ugly people.“

„The Pentagon still has not given a name to the Iraqi war. Somehow 'Operation Re-elect Bush' doesn't seem to be popular.“

„Bob Dole revealed he is one of the test subjects for Viagra. He said on Larry King, 'I wish I had bought stock in it.' Only a Republican would think the best part of Viagra is the fact that you could make money off of it.“

„New Year's Eve, where auld acquaintance be forgot. Unless, of course, those tests come back positive.“


„You're not famous until my mother has heard of you.“

„I think high self-esteem is overrated. A little low self-esteem is actually quite good…Maybe you're not the best, so you should work a little harder.“

„Don't forget Mother's Day. Or as they call it in Beverly Hills, Dad's third wife Day.“

„They keep talking about drafting a constitution for Iraq. Why don't we just give them ours? It was written by a lot of really smart guys. It's worked for over 200 years, and Hell, we're not using it anymore.“

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